Entitlement is rampant today, hence, you need to know you don’t actually owe your kids a whole lot, especially not the things listed here.
In our society everyone is concerned about what we’re entitled to or what we deserve. We keep complaining about the fact that we didn’t get what we deserved.
I am really concerned about our children. I am worried about what we are teaching our children for the future. Are we teaching them how to be grateful for having what they have and work hard, or are we making life too easy for them?
The demands that we make as adults and the things we think we are entitled to are observed by our children. Kids are too observant than we think. They hear us talking and making demands. They understand the tone in our voices when we are doing so. They hear how we speak to others in authority. As they grow older,they hear it all and understand it well. The question is: Is it what you want them to be hearing?
The example our society is setting for our future is that they are entitled to get everything they want.
Often I hear children complaining to their parents. “I want this!” “That’s not fair!” “You promised!” “You have to get me that anyhow“. Do your children think you “OWE” them things?
Here is a piece of important advice: PLEASE DON’T FEEL GUILTY FOR BEING THE PARENT THAT SAYS “NO”.
There are loads of things that we do OWE our children.We definitely owe them our unconditional respect, love, and endless forgiveness. They deserve to have a lovely home, yummy food to keep their tummies happy and healthy, and an education that will help them later in life.
However, there are plenty of things in life they are not entitled to. These are things parents don’t need to feel guilty about. We do not need to feel guilty saying, “NO” to our children! In fact, I’m thankful to parents who say no to their children. TRUST ME, the best way to love your child is to say no!
Here is a list of 10 Things You Don’t Owe Your Child :
1. Children are not entitled to be the best in school. Your child needs to learn that in order to be the best they need to work really hard. If they work hard and practice their skills they will reap the rewards. They also need to understand that despite of a lot of hard work, there might be times that someone else would turn out to be the best, may be because the other child has been working harder.Its important fo the child to know, that more than concentrating on being the best, its great to focus on working hard and trying to be one of the best.
2. Children are not entitled to rewards for good behavior. When you step out of the house and your child behaves well, you don’t “owe” them a reward for good behavior. Its GREAT, that they behaved. I have observed with some friends, that they would tell their child, “Thanks for being so well-behaved today!” and the child says, “You’re welcome, what can we get?!” Life is not a hand-out. Sometimes you just have to do what is expected of you. Now, after teaching them, you can reward them once in a while and not have to continually hear them asking for a reward. I do reward my girl, but just by appreciating her, and by thanking her. And trust me she is a really well behaved child whenever we step out of the house.
3. Children are not entitled to fast food service. Patience is something that is hard to learn, for a child as well as for the parents. Whenever your child demands something, you need not fulfill it immediately. Sometimes it is a good lesson for them to wait patiently. Teaching children to wait is an important lesson. There will be times in life they will have to wait, so they might as well get used to it NOW!
4. Children are not entitled to a maid. Parents’ job is to simply be a parent, not the cleaning and mopping service. Let’s teach our children how to clean up things and how to do simple chores. Let’s teach them that chores do not always mean a reward when they finish. This teaches them responsibility and ownership for their things and their house. Everyone in the house can be responsible for helping to take care of the house. These skills help them in school also. My 2.8 yr old toddler is responsible for her toys. She is responsible to keep her toys back in the rack after playing at the end of the day. Though she is a little clever, because each time I ask he to do, she would pick up a few pieces n say “mumma me tired, please help“. And that little puppy face forces me to help. But I feel its good to lead by example. So the child knows that you are in it with him/her.
5. Children are not entitled to popularity. Everyone is different. Hence, there is no rule that says they will or should have a life full of friends. Teach your child that having good friends is better than having a huge number of friends. Popularity is not the most important part of life to strive for. We would never wish for our children to be without friends, but they need to learn how to make friends and be a good friend in order to have them and keep them.
6. Children are not entitled to every possession they want. Let’s help them appreciate the things they have. Its important for a child to learnt how to be content. Its the best lesson you can teach you child today. Next let’s teach them the value of what they want, and teach them how to save their money for it. They can earn it. You don’t have to get something for them because they want it now. Give them a chance to want it for a little while. They may discover if they wait that they didn’t really want it that desperately. They will also learn to be patient. Your children will appreciate the item even more when they get it after days of waiting!
7. Children are not entitled to be RIGHT all of the time. We all love to think that all the time, we are RIGHT. We don’t admit it, but we are not always RIGHT. Similarly, children are not always right and they need to be taught that they are not. It is our responsibility to correct them when they are wrong. They will make excuses for their behavior or they will argue about why they are right. As parents, we need to curb this behavior early and teach them that it is okay to be wrong and how to admit to being wrong. It’s a hard to swallow, even for adults. If we don’t teach them this lesson they become disrespectful to anyone who tries to tell them they are wrong about anything. Children may be entitled to their opinion. However, let’s teach them how to voice it respectfully and at the correct time!
8. Children are not entitled to WIN all the time. Its a good habit, not to let your children win, when we play games with them. You can keep score in a game and have a winner and, yes, a loser. Children can learn at an early age how to be a GRACIOUS WINNER and not a SORE LOSER. We can teach them that they won’t win every game. We also teach them that we don’t stop playing games because we might lose or because we lost a last game. Competition is a natural instinct but learning how to lose is a lesson we have to learn at some point in life. This lesson will carry through our entire lives. If they learn this early on, adjusting to what life throws at them will be much easier.
9. Children are not entitled to a GOURMET meals. All parents work really hard to the best of their capability to give the best to their children. You may not have time to make a 7-course meal when all that is said and done. As a parent you don’t have to feel guilty about that. You are doing the best you can to provide a healthy balanced meal for your family. Teach your children to respect that. Let’s teach them how to help make those meals! This is a win for everyone!
10. Children are not entitled to pass to the next grade. Our children are all brilliant, kind to others, and selfless, no doubt. We all want to believe that about our children. We know our children. The teachers also know our children. Children may think this, but they are not given a free ride to the next grade level. It is not an automatic pass at the end of the year. Having their hinder in their seat every day is not enough. Children have to work and learn the information necessary to get to the next level. If they don’t put in the time or the work, it is not a free pass. There are students who don’t do their work or don’t think it matters if they get an A or a D on their homework. It matters if they don’t have the skills they need for the next grade!
Kindly note: Children ARE entitled to parents who will teach them the difference between the things in life they have to work for and the things in life that are given freely.
P.S. share my article and spread the love . Lets make motherhood ROCKING!!
Please do share with me your views on the post and also if it helps you in any way!!!
For me parenting is all about love and fun. My girls and I believe in jamming out in the car, in dancing in the rains, and in miracles. We believe in smiling till our cheek hurt and laughing till our neighbours’ ears burst. Parenting definitely comes with loads of challenges,but trust me facing these challenges becomes much more easier by having a fun and a happy attitude towards it.
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