Self Love is important, but what is the real meaning of self love?
I always keep talking about the importance of indulging in self love on my blog and social media, but recently I realised that most of us have misunderstood this term.
It’s really important to understand the real meaning of Self Love and let’s straight away dive into it.
What is the meaning of Self Love?
Self Love is to truly appreciate oneself and indulge in activities that would support one’s psychological, spiritual and physical growth. It means giving your own happiness and well-being the deserved regard and attention. It means making a conscious choice to not sacrifice your mental and physical well-being to please others. Self love is when we don’t settle for anything less than what we deserve.
Self love could mean different for different people, clearly because everyone believes in taking care of themselves in a different way. For the sake of your own mental health you must figure out what self love looks like for you and don’t get influenced by any one else’s definition of Self Love.
Possible meaning of Self Love:
Here’s a list that could define Self love for starters:
- Prioritizing your needs
- Truly trusting yourself and your instincts
- Being kind to yourself
- Setting healthy boundaries for yourself
- Talking about and to yourself with respect and love
- Not indulging in self judgement
- Being truthful to yourself
- Forgiving yourself when you aren’t able to do it all
- Setting realistic expectations for yourself
- Forgiving yourself whenever you are not nice or true to yourself
Did you feel connected to the list above?
Or is your list different than this? Do share what helps you practice self love in the comments. I would love to know what makes you happy.
Most people believe that indulging in self care is equivalent to self love for them, and that’s completely OK , because like I said Self Love is practiced differently by different people.
Sometimes to understand about Self Love we need to go back to basics and listen to our body:
- Make sure you take often breaks from work and stretch or move about
- Take a beak and indulge in something creative
- Keep the phone away and connect with others around you or yourself for real
- Indulge in healthy eating habits but don’t forget to eat your favourite food every once in a while
We must accept ourselves as we are at the moment for everything we are in order to practice self love truthfully. It means we have to also be honest to our emotions and feeling, as that is how we will connect with our soul and real self.
Why must we practice self love?
It must be pretty clear to you by now that Self Love motivates us to make choices that support our mental and physical growth. The moment you place yourself in a spot of high regard and high esteem, you would most definitely make choice that will go in the favour of your holistic growth. These could be in the form of physical exercises , healthy eating habits or maintaining healthy and happy relationships with those around you.
Here are some ways to practice healthy form of Self Love:
- Be mindful – If your indulge in self love truthfully, you would definitely be in sync with your emotions, thoughts and needs.
- Self Care – Taking care of your mind and body will help you love yourself even more. If you are high on Self Love, you would end up nourishing yourself everyday through proper sleep, healthy social activities and interactions, healthy physical activities, intimacy and healthy eating habits.
- Healthy Habit formation – You must do things not just because it has to be done, but because you really care about yourself
Most importantly, Self Love makes more sense when we are gentle, kind, patient and compassionate to ourselves. Treat yourself the way you treat those you really care about and love.
What to do when you get intimidated by someone else’s definition of Self love?
If you are active on social media it’s most likely that you come across people who portray a different lifestyle than yours and it’s pretty easy to judge yourself and your choices due to this. Now let’s back to the point I shared above in this post: Respect your choices, don’t judge yourself and set realistic goals. Everyone’s way to lead their life is different due to the social set up they are in. If you are a mother who is in a nuclear set up and don’t have someone to take care of your kids while you are away, it’s easy to feel little about your situation looking at the mothers who have the freedom to step out. Remember I said ‘Be kind to yourself‘? It all boils down to this point. We must understand that to indulge in self love, we must be kind to ourselves and think positively about the lifestyle we have. If you aren’t able to step out alone that doesn’t mean you are failing at self love, it just means your priorities are different. It means you must set realistic self love goals taking in consideration that you have no option but to be there for your kids. If you really feel the need to step out do ask for help from those around you.
I personally have no one to take care of my girls while I am away, unless my husband is able to take a leave or someone from my family makes and effort to fly down to the city. This is why my ways of indulging in self love doesn’t even include ‘Getaway time‘. I focus on how I can love myself without having to run away from my parenting responsibilities, which includes : sitting in the balcony with a book and coffee, going for a drive with my girls, getting a spa done at home, going for mommy kid dates with just my girls or other moms and their kids, putting on my favourite music and dancing like no one’s watching. Well! the list is pretty long, but I am sure you got my point.
My self love list doesn’t involve anything that would make me feel little about myself or the life I am leading. That’s what I encourage you all to do too.
The point is to sit with yourself and think about things that make you happy. Then prioritise things that make you the happiest. If someone you know says that Self love only means that you get to do things without your kids, they are wrong (that is their definition of self love, not yours).
Be real to yourself and respect the life you have created for yourself!
Love yourself and be kind to yourself.
Please promise me that you would create your own self love list and not feel intimidated about someone else’s list.
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Read: Loving myself makes me a happy Parent
Read: Self love is the key
Read: Life Coach For kids who could help your kids reach their goals.
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